Art was my dream. It was my passion. I even got into my dream art school. But I didn’t go. I sold my passion for the idea of money. Now I’m so unhappy. At least if I was doing art I would’ve been happy. I would be doing my passion. It wouldn’t matter than I’m broke. I would be happy. Fuck.
Is it bad that my birthday is usually the worst day of the year for me? I just want to skip it and let it be Monday already. But, actually, this year it won’t be the worst day. The worst day of the year already happened. It will probably be a close second. What ever..
There is something so beautiful about passion. When you look at a person with passion you can see the fire burning in their eyes. You see how much they love what they are passionate about. They are fully engrossed and mesmerized by what they are passionate about. And that love, that strong love, is just beautiful.
When I was on the train yesterday a man was reading musical notes. As he read them he would move his hands along with the notes. As he read, his passion for music was evident. He had the biggest, most genuine smile on his face. He was in his own little world. A crying baby two seats from him could not distract or discourage him from continuing. Seeing such passion, made me feel so happy. It’s hard to find people with such passion these days. I just wanted to watch him, in a non creepy way, but unfortunately my stop came and I had to depart. There’s not a lot of things I find truly beautiful, but that was beautiful, and it was inspiring.
I do everything I can to make her smile because her smile just makes it all better.
The cool that comes after a storm on a hot muggy day.
Usually when we go out we tend to spot some cars that I would like to own. She knows I’m a car guy. So I point at the cars I like and say, “That’s my car.” And she always says something like, “Really? Why don’t we get in?” I then respond by saying something along the lines of I forgot them and we’re better off walking. I thought it would be really great if one day I point at a car and we do the whole above stint except when she asks, “Why don’t we get in?” I would walk over to the door and open it for her and ask her to get in. She would be so surprised and I would be so happy. That’s one of my goals for this coming year.
Is it really bad that I don’t want to go back to school? It’s not like I don’t want to learn, it’s just that there are so many people I don’t want to see or deal with anymore.
People that don’t understand No means No.
If you ask me if I want to smoke with you and I say NO because I quit 6 months ago don’t try to pressure me into it. Don’t say, “Come on dude, you’re really going to be rude like that and not smoke with me?” That’s seriously so fucked up that you’re going to try and pressure me into something so bad for me after I told you I quit. It’s like offering a recovering alcoholic a beer. You just don’t do that. Then don’t ask me to smoke in my car and whine that I won’t let you. I really do not like people like this. (I kicked him out of my car and he walked home.)
Sorry for the rant guys.